So How to Train Your Dragon 2 is out. We are big fans of Hiccup and Toothless around here, and while we haven't seen it yet, I'm excited to see it soon (hopefully).
In the meantime, though, I was shocked--SHOCKED I SAY--to find out that the movie has a Gay Agenda™. Apparently, Gobber is gay. I, personally, am delighted. Certain sects of our society are not, however:
While the homosexual reference is subtle, many parents and pastors are dismayed by the filmmaker's decision to impose the homosexual agenda on children.
Pastor Kevin Swanson, father of five and Director of Generations with Vision, says presenting a mentor figure as homosexual to children is dangerous.
"Gobber is teaching the children the means by which they fight off the dragon," he stated on his radio show. "Gobber is the mentor. Gobber is the mentor to Hiccup, who is the protagonist in "How to Train Your Dragon 2."
"Of course, the producers are going to reveal the mentor as homosexual," Swanson continued. "The answer is obvious, for the same reason why the Greek mentors were homosexual, and they were focused in on what the Christian fathers used to refer to as the corruption of boys, and we can also throw out the term pedophilia."So yeah...there's all of that.
Anyway, this reminded me of all of the other lovely kids' movies over the years that have been decried based on this or that by the conservative religious folks in our nation. So I decided to compile a short list, so that any of you other rebels can also corrupt and demoralize the next generation.
For your enjoyment, I am supplying the very first Over the Cuckoo's Nest Blog Movie Parenting Guide. It is up to you guys to ascertain which are real complaints I managed to find on the internet, and which are actually made up.
Snow White** Advocates witchcraft
** 7 male dwarves in close quarters
** Snow White kisses a boy before she is married.
Cinderella** Advocates witchcraft
** Does not maintain safe distance between dancing individuals
** Talking animals promotes animism
Sleeping Beauty** Advocates witchcraft
** Kisses a boy before she is married
Beauty and the Beast** Promotes homosexual agenda with at least two homosexual characters
** Belle is more interested in books than marriage
** Belle touches Beast before marriage
Lion King** Timon and Pumbaa are supposedly homosexual
** Promotes animism
** Promotes witchcraft
** Teaches kids to look to themselves for guidance instead of God
Pocahontas** Crimes against history
** Teaches kids to respect all religions
** Shows Native Americans in a better light than colonists
Hercules** Paints Herc as an imitation of Jesus Christ which could confuse those who are unfamiliar with
Tarzan** Teaches evolution
Toy Story** Promotes a tortured bromance
** Homosexual agenda
** Toys are obviously named after "mom toys"
Brother Bear** Advocates witchcraft
** Advocates animism
Fantasia** Advocates witchcraft
** Advocates paganism
Aladdin** Challenges monotheism
** Jafar is obviously gay--homosexual agenda
Frozen** Promotes homosexual agenda
Fox and the Hound** Promotes homosexual agenda
Bambi** Promotes animism
Pirates of the Caribbean** Promotes homosexual agenda
The Little Mermaid** No way is that crab straight
Paranorman** Promotes homosexual agenda
Pinocchio** Promotes homosexual agenda
Lilo & Stitch** Promotes transgender agenda
** Promotes homosexual agenda
** Shows women in inappropriate dress
** Features science "playing God"
Mulan** Features a cross-dressing woman
I will post the answers to which are real and which are not with our 12:00 post for those that aren't familiar. In the meantime, feel free to leave your guesses in the comments below.
I'd also love to hear what the heck you movie rebels are watching.